Sunday, February 20, 2011

Vegan banana/chocolate chunk/peanut butter muffins

this recipe is loosely based on one from but I changed it a lot, so am posting it here. They are really tasty.

you will need:
115g plain flour
115g cornmeal
65g sugar
1 tbsp baking powder
1 tsp flaky sea salt
1 mashed banana
2 tbsp crunchy peanut butter
100ml rapeseed oil
120ml soy milk (plus extra if needed)
squeeze of lemon juice
50g dairy-free dark chocolate, smashed into bits

Pre-heat oven to 200 degrees

Combine the flour, cornmeal, sugar, baking powder in one bowl, make sure there are no lumps.
In another bowl whisk together the banana, peanut butter, oil, lemon juice and soy milk. Add this to the dry ingredients. If your mixture looks too thick then add some more soy milk to make it runnier, you want a thick batter texture.
Fold in the chocolate bits.
Pour into greased muffin tins, fill them 3/4 of the way to the top.
Bake for 18 minutes.

Monday, January 10, 2011


this now serves as the mask for 'hippy predator'


I set myself the challenge of making this in 14 days. I went one day over. Never mind. Felt like a penance as the back and sleeves in plain black = BORING!

Quite pleased with it though.

Please note that 'blunt force trauma' is not a music reference, merely the type of injuries one gets from being hit with a heavy object eg. sledgehammer. Good.


Everyone loses, no-one wins
I have seen the future and this is how it begins
In chaos and riots, the screech of machines
No right and no wrong and no in between
Fall one by one, the queen to her fool
Dos dedos mis amigos - everything's cool


Molotov cocktail and 1970s kids TV presenter colours. Niiiiice.


Handknit, crap acrylic yarn. Inspired by Margaret Atwood, George Orwell, Banksy, 2000 AD, state surveillence and paranoia (unless of course a paranoid is simply a person in posession of all the facts). It's pink because that's the yarn I had in sufficient quantities.

Be pure!
You can be chaste, you can behave
You can be mine, you'll be my cure
Be my religion, be my decision
You'll be my crime, you will be mine - Raymond Watts

Sunday, January 9, 2011

new paintings

click to embiggen.

it's taken me months to get these finished, that is shameful.

Monday, October 5, 2009

the horror of cooking

I tend to reserve my point and laugh posts for knitwear, however today I will make an exception. My mum got this book cheap in a sale, and thought that she'd picked up a real bargain. She's a strict vegan so a huge book of tofu recipes sounds like the perfect purchase, right? WRONG! This is no normal cookbook, there is something deeply and fundamentally wrong with it.

The Giant Book of Tofu Cooking

So, it's a book about cooking with tofu. There are lots of recipes, for everything from starters, to main courses, desserts, sauces, baked goods. It's certainly not lacking in scope. What it is lacking in however is nutritional good sense and potentially edible recipes.

Call me presumptuous if you like, but I would assume that tofu would be used as the main protein ingredient in the recipes, or as a replacer for eggs or dairy. What I was not expecting was to see it used alongside eggs, cheese and butter. It seems as if the tofu has been added to recipes for no decent reason. For example, there is a recipe for hoummous in here where some of the chickpeas have been substituted for tofu. Why? I have no idea. Another wonderful example is:
"Southern fried tofu with tofu-enhanced mashed potatoes - looking for some homemade country cooking without all the fat? Read on. Serve with cornbread and coleslaw for a complete Southern meal."

It's panfried tofu cubes, served with potatoes that are mashed together with soft tofu. I don't know if it's just me, but this sounds both bland and nightmarish.

For the most part, the tofu in these recipes is used unmarinaded which as anyone who has eaten plain tofu will know, is horribly bland. The few recipes that do call for marinading are the most edible looking out of the whole book. Which brings me to my next criticism - bizarre ingredient combinations only a maniac could have dreamed up.
Here's a few of the most "interesting" sounding:

"Gazpacho - We've added some tropical flair to this traditional Spanish soup with the addition of sweet pineapple"

This is vandalism! Why would you do that? Gazpacho doesn't need pineapple in it. It also doesn't need diced plain tofu sprinkled on top like soggy, dreadful croutons.

"Mediterranean Banana Tortilla wedges - Mediterranean cuisine is known for its delicious and surprising flavour combinations. These crispy tortilla wedges are filled with savory layers of banana, tofu and fresh cilantro. Serve with a big bowl of chilled salsa."
There is nothing Mediterranean about combining tortillas, bananas, coriander and salsa. I am almost tempted to make this just to see how horrible it really is but that would be a waste of food and time. This sounds absolutely stomach churningly revolting.

Other things worthy of special mention are a supposedly South African dish made from onions, bread, raisins, nuts, chutney and chunks of tofu topped off with savoury egg custard and baked, a pasta bake that contains tomatoes, cinnamon, yoghurt, ricotta cheese, parmesan cheese, and tofu, pumpkin and tofu pancakes, and that traditional Spanish dessert, tofu flan.

This reads like an elaborate joke. I will have hours of fun reading the recipes and rolling about on the floor convulsed with laughter. However I can't imagine ever wanting to eat any of this.

If you're mad enough to want to buy it after reading this review then it's available on Amazon here. I think anyone posting good reviews is clearly mental.